Salad for idiots

Tonight when I got home from work I made a salad and while eating it I looked at the bag.  Apparently now on the Dole bags of lettuce there is a lettuce-taste scale and also a "Pairs well with:" section.  My leafy Romaine pairs well with "shallots, carrots and radishes".  No way!  Carrots and radishes in a salad??  Who would have guessed that?  Then it got me thinking...wouldn't it be sweet if humans came with their own "pairs well with" section? Yes, yes it would.  If we came packaged with directions think how much time and energy that would save?  It would save like 30 years.  If you met a new person you could read their "pairs well with" section and decide if you wanted to be friends.  If you met a new potential significant other you could read their "pairs well with" section and decide as well.  This guy pairs well with blondes who play World of Warcraft?  Not for me.  Sooooo much time would be saved!  On the down side, half of the fun in life is discovering what you pair well with.  It might be kind of a let-down if at age 8 you already knew that you paired well with sarcastic people, cats, v-neck t-shirts, burgundy lipstick and guys who drive white pick-up trucks.  What would be the point of trying anything new if you already knew what worked?  I am 25, (almost 26) so I think I have some idea what my own label would say.  This is the best I could come up with: La...pairs well with sunshine, horses and dogs, well-mannered people, Firefly vodka and lemonade, Harry Potter, black patent stilettos, borderline-metro guys and cotton candy.  Maybe I should make myself a shirt....