disgruntled much? read the pets

I had a patient in triage last night that was so angry, no matter what I did she was bound and determined to be mad and aggressive.  When it comes to patients like those, you can never win...you just be as nice as possible and...be as nice as possible. This usually makes them more mad.

You have to find lots of ways to entertain yourself during aforementioned night shifts...yes, still on night shift.  A new fun diversion my unit clerk friend and I do (besides answering the phone as Buddy the Elf..."what's your favorite color?") is I read craigslist ads to her in a variety of voices, usually the Pet section.  Here are some actual excerpts, spelling and all:

"Nicaraguan Red Tail Boa, previously abused, a little jumpy, must have no fear but otherwise beautiful and loveable" - Sounds fun...also how do you abuse a snake and does a snake remember that??

"I have 8 freshwater Tiger moray eels (Gymnothorax Polyuranodon) that I don't want to part with but bills come first" - What?

"My daughter is in need of a companion puppy preferably a lab or golden retriever. I have a hot wheel collection I'm willing to trade" - again...What?

"I've got some aggresive fish that need to go beacuse I have new plans for my tanks" - What new plans could you have for fish tanks besides fish?  And why add the fish are aggressive?  

And my favorite in a city overrun with rabbits....EVERYWHERE...in the Lost and Found section, "Found-friendly bunny rabbit. Very sweet, misses it's family. Please email or call with description. It will be taken to the Animal Shelter on Monday" - I am guessing it is wild and yes it probably does miss its family and no the shelter probably doesn't want it.